Monday, January 30, 2006


I joined the "Immortal Institute" today. Looks like a good spot. I've thought about devoting my life to the Holy Grail of science quite a few times. When I was young, I used to tell myself that's what I would do. Lately I've also been thinking about height -- now I'm at the crossroads in my life where I could go science or liberal arts/law. The liberal arts would be easier now, and the law could possibly make me more money -- but should I trust other people to do the groundbreaking biological research for me?

I still haven't declared my major...just keep putting it off...

Appetite is back

So strange. You never really realize how nice it is to be well until you're well. For the past week I've been able to eat again. I still get full, but I no longer get the nausea. Life is good(not).

The Ski Trip

was full of the dull people. I bawled my head off one night cause I was high and drunk; despondent over the girls who'd rejected me and all the tall, good-looking Canadians that I couldn't compete with. Overall a dissapointment - an experience.

God my writing must suck. I read literature but my words never flow; here I second-guess myself again. Empty, narcisstic prattle.

I'm going through weed withdrawals.

Friday, January 13, 2006

Seduction Insider and Alpha males

After reading someone's schpiel on their 'alphaness' on the SOI forum, I went searching for websites to tell me what an alpha male is. Eventually I found Seduction Insider. Decent website with tons of free info. I've been reading it for a while. Good stuff.

Bowie's 'alpha male' leadership skills leave a lot to be desired. If someone had ever beaten up someone who was down at my school, he'd get a lotta shit. Someone who has to force respect like that is not a good alpha male.

I haven't taken anyone's advice on how to deal with my Jen situation, who 'just wants to be friends'. She hints that she's dropping her bf. The other day she said I made her dizzy when I was around her. Yet she shows all the classic signs of friendship. I'm hardly even trying anymore.